Oh, Dear.

"Please don't ever sacrifice your femininity for the short-lived satisfaction of having a guy at your side.  Most guys today are not yet worth the rare beauty of a set-apart young woman.  Be patient, and pray daily.  In God's economy, the years of loneliness and pain given to serving and obeying Him are always gloriously worth it." -Eric Ludy

Sigh.  This statement is weighing very heavily on my heart today.  I can't help but want to drop everything I'm "committed" to doing, curl up on my bed, and seek God in fervent prayer.  I know that I need to bring this burden to Him and wrestle it over.  Conviction will arise, I am sure.

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Something I learned this past weekend is that when God puts something on your heart which requires action, do it.  Spend a lot of time in prayer, seeking the courage and strength that only He can give in order to fulfill what He is calling you to do, and trust Him to be in it.  He placed a conversation on my heart that really needed to happen, and I wrestled it over with God for a good while.  I'm ashamed to admit that I tried to deny its necessity; I tried to deny God's placement of it on my heart.  Ouch.

Thankfully, God never ceases in His pursuit of His children, and His Spirit will convict and prompt us despite our "superior knowledge of the situation" (or whatever may be hindering us to trust Him).  When God opens the door and the Holy Spirit leads you to do what you've been called to, it is then that a choice must be made: to obey or to ignore.  In my particular situation,  I obeyed, and the peace that overflowed my heart once I did was indescribable.  As a result, I was reminded of the incredible truth that when you are obedient and faithful, He is faithful.

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And so now I commit the rest of this day to be spent with my Jesus in wholehearted prayer, continuing to seek His face and voice.  He has spoken many truths to me these last few days and, despite how difficult they are to face and although I wish He didn't trust me so much with them, I will continue to give it over to Him.  I will continue to seek growth as His daughter, becoming a more godly and noble woman (hopefully!), and I will continue to trust in His timing.