This past week has been a little crazy, though probably won't even compare with the week that I have coming up! Can we all agree that "Leap Day - you know, February 29th, that day that only comes around once every four years - is quite possibly the weirdest day ever? Or at least it was this year? Thanks.
What made the week even crazier was the humbling lesson that the Lord so clearly began to teach me, which culminated yesterday in tears, in regard to my serious issue with pride. I'll be candid: I struggle greatly with feeling as though I "deserve" certain things, and when those things change, I sometimes try to get my way. I'm ashamed to admit that I sometimes even resort to emotional manipulation... and it's an ugly, unbecoming thing.
On two separate occasions yesterday, the Lord brought me to places of utterly necessary humility. It was embarrassing to witness myself acting in such a disgraceful and childish manner, and I was honestly disgusted with my thoughts and resulting actions. I sought and was graciously given forgiveness in both situations, but I find that I am still unsettled. There are things that I know that I need to work out with God alone, as what was breaking His heart has begun to break my own.
I believe that the Lord is taking me on a journey of true humility right now. There are areas in my life where I know I am quite humble (oh wow does that sound ironic...), yet there are also plenty of areas where I am not even close. The process of humbling oneself is an ongoing one, and I am grateful for the grace that God has given so that I can grow into a more godly person through this process.